The Two Kinds of Freedom

A book about the dystopian future, Handmaid's Tale made me realize that there are so many freedoms that I take for granted.   Gilead is the end-product of an ultra-conservative group's destabilization and call for a new world order.  It tells of a world without choice, especially for women.  Women were stripped of all properties and all rights and were treated as chattels, judged according to their use in society.  We have the Wives, the Marthas, the Handmaids, etc.

"There is more than one kind of freedom...Freedom to and freedom from. In the days of anarchy, it was freedom to. Now you are being given freedom from. Don't underrate it."

 
Given the amount of freedom that I am enjoying today, it haunts me to think that there might come a time where I will only have freedom from choice, instead of the freedom to choose.  I hope it never happens in my lifetime.  I hope it never happens...Period.

"You can wet the rim of a glass and run your finger around the rim and it will make a sound. This is what I feel like: this sound of glass. I feel like the word shatter."

Mao II: A Look on Terrorism and Mass Organization

Don DeLillo's 10th novel, Mao II deals with terrorism and mass media that were also the themes explored in his novel, Falling Man. 

"What terrorists gain, novelists lose.  The degree to which they influence mass consciousness is the extent of our decline as shapers of sensibility and thought."

Considering that the work was published in 1991, the novel is considered to be ahead of its time in foreseeing an age of terror and its effect on America.  One of the main themes explored in the novel is the "psychology of crowds" as seen in the mass cult wedding depicted in the first chapters.  I liked Falling Man more but I think the reason for this is because I will never forget watching on television the actual falling down of the two towers and I saw how this changed the world.

As to the title of the novel...

"Bill had his picture taken not because he wanted to come out of hiding but because he wanted to hide more deeply, he wanted to revise the terms of seclusion, he needed the crisis of exposure to give him a powerful reason to intesify his concealment.  Years ago there were stories that Bill was dead...they were not about Bill so much as people's need to make mysteries and legends.  Now Bill was devising his own cycle of death and resurgence.  It made Scott think of great leaders who regenerate their power by sropping out of sight and then staging messianic returns.  Mao Zedong of course..."

Even though this has always been a personal blog, I have carefully avoided in making this, well, too personal....and a lot of it went into making sure that I don't put up any rants whatsoever...but in retrospect, screw that...

it's 12:40 am...my back is killing me but my mind refuses to go to sleep...(sorry spine, you just have to buck it up)...it's true what they say that if you don't expect, you won't get disappointed....easier said than done...i guess i just assumed i meant a little more...they say that when you assume, you just make an ass of U and me...more of me in this case....oh well, those tears cried are lessons learned...crystallizing everything in its proper place, correct perspective...message received, loud and clear

times like this, i just want to shrug it all off and walk away...don't worry, i can feel the blood already coagulating...what doesn't kill you just makes you stronger

speaking in riddles...so what...get your own blog

"We carry the dead with us only until we die too"

"Thus in the minds of the many does the one ramify and disperse. It does not last, it cannot, it is not immortality. We carry the dead with us only until we die too, and then it is we who are borne along for a little while, and then our bearers in their turn drop, and so on into the unimaginable generations...True, there will be something of us that will remain, a fading photograph, a lock of hair, a few fingerprints, a sprinkling of atoms in the air of the room where we breathed our last, yet none of this will be us, what we are and were, but only the dust of the dead."

 Winner of the Man Booker Prize and John Banville's 18th novel, The Sea is told in Max Morden's viewpoint.  Reeling from his wife's death, Max retreats to a cottage by the sea where he used to spend his summers.  It is there that we are taken in a journey through his recollections of his childhood summers with the Graces and the time before his wife's death.  The novel was poignant and honest and all praises for this book are well-deserved.

To love life for what it is....

A mark of a truly great book is when it makes you realize something about yourself and/or the world you live in.  The Hours by Michael Cunningham gave me something extraordinary.  It gave me a sense of normalcy.

"We live our lives, do whatever we do, and then we sleep. It's as simple and ordinary as that. A few jump out windows, or drown themselves, or take pills; more die by accident; and most of us are slowly devoured by some disease, or, if we're very fortunate, by time itself. There's just this for consolation: an hour here or there when our lives seem, against all odds & expectations, to burst open & give us everything we've ever imagined, though everyone but children (and perhaps even they) know these hours will inevitably be followed by others, far darker and more difficult. Still, we cherish the city, the morning, we hope, more than anything for more. Heaven only knows why we love it so."
-Laura

The book is simply beautiful. The re-imagining of Virginia's life and its relation to Laura and Clarissa was exquisite

"To look life in the face. Always to look life in the face. And to know it for what it is. At last to know it is. To love it for what it is. And then to put it away. Leonard always the years between us, always the years. Always the love. Always the hours."
-Virginia

A Spark of Inspiration

There are times in your life that you suddenly stop and wonder what the hell it is you are doing with your life.  I don't think I could say it any better than Ayn Rand:

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours."

-Ayn Rand (Atlas Shrugged)

"A Statue of Atlas at the Rockefeller Plaza"

Twenty-one: Tess of 'd Ubervilles

Interesting Factoid?

The book was made into a movie by Roman Polanski.  He decided to make this into a movie because he was given a copy of the novel by his late wife the last time he saw her.

Impressions?

The whole time I was reading it, the only thing I can think about is how tragic the story is.  It tells of the loss of innocence, the loss of love and faith.  Tess is a compelling character and you can’t help but be haunted by her plight.

Most Memorable?

"Thus, the thing began. Had she perceived this meeting's import she might have asked why she was doomed to be seen and coveted that day by the wrong man, and not by some other man, the right and desired one in all respects..."

"You, and those like you, take your fill of pleasure on earth by making the life of such as me bitter and black with sorrow; and then it is a fine thing, when you have had enough of that, to think of securing your pleasure in heaven by becoming converted!"

Twenty-one: Sense and Sensibility

Interesting Factoid?

This is the first novel of Jane Austen and underwent several revisions before finally being published in 1811.  The first draft was finished in 1795 when Jane was only 19.

Impressions?

My first Jane Austen (I’m not proud).  This is the only book in this list with a happy ending.  Compared to the other books, this is actually light reading.  When I say light reading, I am in no way pertaining to the content but to the effect it has on me as a reader.  It was actually a welcome change from all the “heavy” reading I have been doing so far.

Most Memorable Lines?

“There is something so amiable in the prejudices of a young mind, that one is sorry to see them give way to the reception of more general opinions.”

“Elinor had not needed ... to be assured of the injustice to which her sister was often led in her opinion of others, by the irritable refinement of her own mind, and the too great importance placed by her on the delicacies of a strong sensibility and the graces of a polished manner. Like half the rest of the world, if more than half there be that are clever and good, Marianne, with excellent abilities and an excellent disposition, was neither reasonable nor candid. She expected from other people the same opinions and feelings as her own, and she judged of their motives by the immediate effect of their actions on herself.”

Twenty-one: The Age of Innocence

Interesting Factoid?

The Age of Innocence – Although the book also serves as a sort of commentary on the high society with its its use of irony and other literary tools, Edith Wharton considers this novel as an “apology” for how brutal her other book (The House of Mirth) was.

Impressions?

I loved this book.  I loved the way Edith Wharton played with language and the barely veiled contempt for high society.  I can’t wait to read The House of Mirth

Most Memorable Lines?

“In reality they all lived in a kind of hieroglyphic world, where the real thing was never said or done or even thought, but only represented by a set of arbitrary signs…”

“It would presently be his task to take the bandage from this young woman's eyes, and bid her look forth on the world. But how many generations of the women who had gone to her making had descended bandaged to the family vault?”

Twenty-one: The Trial

Interesting Factoid?

The actual novel was never completed by Franz Kafka.  He instructed his friend Max Brod to burn the manuscript upon his death.

Impressions?

Although it is unfinished, the novel is still powerful.  Maybe that is part of the reason why it has made such an impact.  The fact that we would forever wonder what it could have been otherwise

Most Memorable lines?

“It’s sometimes quite astonishing  that a single, average life is enough to encompass so much that it’s at all possible ever to have any success in one’s work here. On the other hand, there are also dark moments, such as everyone has, when you think you’ve achieved nothing at all, when it seems that only the trials to come to a good end are those that were determined to have a good end from the start and would do so without any help, and all the others are lost despite all the running to and fro, all the effort…”

Twenty-one: A Clockwork Orange

Interesting Factoid?

In one of his other works, Anthony Burgess has stated that he is prepared to repudiate this novel because of the danger of it being misunderstood. 

Impressions?

Like the movie, the book was really violent but contrary to what other people might think, the book does not actually promote violence.  For me, it is actually about the concept of good and evil.  If someone does not have a choice but to do good, will it even count?  The concept of a clockwork orange also made a strong impression on me.  Organic on the outside but mechanical on the inside.

Most Memorable Lines?

“When a man cannot choose he ceases to be a man”

“Is a man who chooses the bad perhaps in some ways better than a man who has the good imposed upon him”

“The attempt to impose upon man, a creature of growth and capable of sweetness, to ooze juicily at the last round the bearded lips of God, to attempt to impose, I say, laws and conditions appropriate to a mechanical creation”

Twenty-One: Falling Man

Interesting Factoid?

There is a performance artist in the book that suspends himself upside down wearing a business attire reminiscent of a photograph by Richard Dew.  Don DeLillo claims that he did not know that the title of the photograph is also Falling Man

Impressions?

A couple of firsts with this book.  First novel I read that is related to 9/11 and my first Don DeLillo.  What can I say, it was an awesome first impression and I can’t wait to get started with both Underworld and White Noise.

Most Memorable lines?

“There were people shouting up at him, outraged at the spectacle, the puppetry of human desperation, a body’s last fleet breath and what it held.  It held the gaze of the world, she thought.  There was the awful openness of it, something we’d not seen, the single falling figure that trails a collective dread, body come down among us all.”       

“But does a man have to kill himself in order to count for something, be someone, find the way?”

Twenty-one: Their Eyes Were Watching God

Interesting Factoid?

This book along with its author Zora Neale-Hurston almost slipped into “oblivion”.  It took the efforts of Alice Walker, author of The Color Purple, to renew interest in Neale-Hurston and her works.

Impressions?

I liked how the author used the vernacular of that time to make the story come alive.  I know that there were people who actually criticized the use of the language as mocking but I don’t believe that Zora meant it to be that way.  For me, it gave it color (no pun intended)

Most Memorable lines?

“She found that she had a host of thoughts she had never expressed to him, and numerous emotions she had never let Jody know about. Things packed up and put away in her heart where he could never see them.  She was saving up feelings for some man she had never seen”

“…their eyes straining against crude walls and their souls asking if He meant to measure their puny might against His.  They seemed to be staring at the dark, but their eyes were watching God”

“…love ain’t somethin’ lak uh grindstone dat’s de same thing tuh everything it touch.  Love is lak de sea.  It’s uh movin’ thing, but still and all, it takes its shape from de shore it meets, and it’s different with every shore”

Twenty-One

00As usual, I have been pretty behind in updating the blog in terms of the books I have read so far.  The thought of not being able to accomplish what I have set out to do has been in the back of my mind for quite some time.  The thought nags me at the oddest hours and in varying degrees that I just have to do something about it.  I have just finished Wuthering Heights this morning and with that, my list now totals 14 which is frankly overwhelming.

So here is how it would work.  

7 books.

3 questions. Interesting Factoid? Impressions? Most memorable lines?

Start.

Reverse Insomnia

Weekends are supposed to be avenues to get some much needed rest and relaxation.  It is supposed to give you some of your sanity back.  Unfortunately, this is not always the case.  I woke up last Saturday at 3 AM and could not get back to sleep no matter how hard I tried.  Ok, ok, I'll be the first one to admit that playing Plants vs Zombies Survival Endless Mode is not exactly the most effective way of going about it. 

To make a long story short, my body clock is so messed up.  My body is telling me that it is already Friday even though there are still four more workdays to go.  I either keep myself awake through countless cups of coffee or prop my body upright with a stick.  The way I am feeling, I may even need to do both...Somebody HELP!!!!!

Happiness in the little things

Last weekend, we finally were able to push through with a family gathering of sorts with my brother and his family.  It is true what they say that life has the habit of getting in between of things so even if we all wanted to meet up more often, we just have to make do with the scarce opportunities that are given to us. 

The last time that we met up was for Patrick's birthday last July.  This time it was for Neejay's birthday.  As always, it's a treat for me to see my brother, Neejay and his family.  I can't get over how much Rich looks like my brother when he was still toddler.  We tried one of the Japanese restaurants in Rockwell, Zaifu.  Yummy.  Well, I'm biased when it comes to Japanese food but one sure sign that the restaurant was good was that there were at least two Japanese families eating there when we came in.  I don't think you can see that happening in Tokyo Tokyo anytime soon. Special mention goes to Spicy Tuna Cheese Roll.  I'm not even sure if it's their specialty but I loved it nonetheless.  Hehehe.

It is also worth mentioning that after months of scouring various bookstores for a copy of Anna Karenina, a classic by Leo Tolstoy, I finally hit jackpot last weekend.  Considered to be one of the greatest novels of the 19th century, it is really sad that when I try to look for a copy (or even any book by Leo Tolstoy), the closest I get is Android Karenina.  Just goes to show how much books are valued or not valued in this country.  Fully Booked in Rockwell only reopened last Saturday so it was really luck in my part that I happen to be there last Sunday and that we had a few minutes to burn.  I was also lucky to chance upon an extra-helpful employee who was patient enough to look for the book despite the chaos. 

Last weekend reminded me that happiness doesn't have to be in the extravagant things.  Most of the time, it is in the small things that we tend to overlook.  Happiness is finding a book when you least expect it...it is in watching my nephew's eyes light up while watching the water fountain...it is in the silent moments when you don't feel like doing anything else but just hold hands with the one you love....

Reprieve from self-imposed sabbatical

It has only been two weeks since my last entry but somehow, it feels like I have been playing truant for much longer than that.  I guess I just wanted to prove to myself that this is something that is entirely up to me and that I am free to stop this whenever I feel like I have had enough.  There were even moments when I just forgot why I am doing this in the first place.  I know...I know...it's too soon to experience any kind of burn out relating to this.  I guess this just hits much closer to home than I would care to admit.  I neither want nor care to elaborate on that one.  What I can say is that after the closest thing I can have for a retreat, it all came down to why I was doing this in the first place and simply not caring about everything else.

I am honest enough to say that this won't be the last time I will feel the need for some sort of break.  People forget.  Basic human nature.  Lessons learned will have to be re-learned over and over again.  So, what's my take-away from all this.  Well, there's the backlog of about 10 books to begin with but everything else considered, I consider myself lucky. 

Getting in touch with the "Tookish" side in me

Every once in a while, when you are least expecting it, you stumble upon a book that inadvertently captures you in ways that you can't imagine.  That was the case for me and The Hobbit.  It has been a while since I last posted anything here and as can be expected in such a prolonged absence, I am about five books behind in terms of blog entries.  I know I should really set out in catching up with those entries first but I just finished The Hobbit and I haven't been this excited about a book for a while now.

Simply put, this book took over my imagination and awakened in me a sense of adventure.  I actually lament over the fact that it is only now that I read it.  The book was written by Tolkien for his own children and was the predecessor for the Lord of the Rings trilogy.  Considered a classic in children's literature, I can attest that this can still be enjoyed by all ages.  I was actually postponing the reading of this book.  Although I have read my share of fantasy fiction, I know that there are books that can be quite daunting.  My own experience with the Lord of the Rings is a proof of that.  The only reason that I started it was because we watched the Fellowship of the Rings last Sunday and after finishing "Falling Man" yesterday, I decided I might as well re-explore the world of Tolkien's Middle-Earth.  And boy, what an experience it was.

I was so immersed in this other world made up of elves, dwarves, trolls, orcs and I found myself rooting for Bilbo and his company.  The experience was amazing.  After finishing the book, I was reluctant to let go and there were moments that I even considered re-reading the Lord of the Rings Trilogy but of course this will have to wait given the number of books that I have on my plate right now.  I have to content myself in re-watching the trilogy and rooting for the movie adaptation of this book to be finally made.

I am humbled by this book and the only fitting tribute that I can give it is that I will give my nephews and the other children in my future a copy of the book when they reach the age of twelve.  Hopefully, it fires up their imagination and sense of wonderment as it did mine and instills in them a sense of adventure and boundless opportunities.

Making a case for the Ipad

Blogging can be quite tricky sometimes, especially if you're trying to be consistent.  My previous posts have mostly been on my personal impressions on the books I am reading as part of my goal for 2012.  The hard thing for me is that there are times that I am able to think of what I want to write about a particular book or thing but I am not able to do so because I am in the mall or whatever and then when I do get the chance to sit down and write, I find myself staring blankly and trying to squeeze out every word.

I guess that makes a good case for getting myself an Ipad.  Bwahaha. I was skeptical about this when it was first introduced (and the fact that the name tends to remind people of something else does not help) but thinking about it, it would certainly be more economical than getting a Kindle. 

The Ipad would have been especially useful last weekend.  Last Thursday, we suddenly decided to go to the province because of the declared holiday on Friday.  I have already finished The Age of Innocence and Their Eyes were Watching God and was supposed to blog about it over the weekend but our change of plans made it impossible to do so.  The lack of internet connection could account for that.  Flashes and glimpses of what I want to write about those two books haunted me during the long weekend.  Oh well, I guess that is the sacrifice one has to pay.  That and about a thousand bucks. hehehe  It was well worth it because I finally got the chance to get some rest and relaxation away from the distractions of the city.  Sometimes I get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of the Internet age that I just want to "disconnect" myself from everything.  No facebook, no twitter, no YM, no cable tv, no nothing.

I was also able to finish Sense and Sensibility during the trips to and from and the down times (somehow, there are a lot more of these when you are in the province..hehehe).  All that seafood (and well food in general) also goes a long way to make up for whatever inconvenience.  The only real downside is that the fact that I spent the whole three days doing practically nothing made the monday blues yesterday even more acute.  But as they say, all good things must come to an end.

Journeying with Stephen Dedalus

James Joyce's A Portrait of the Artist as A Young Man is a semi-autobiographical novel that tells of the early life of Stephen Dedalus.  The last name of the protagonist alludes to Greek Mythology's Dedalus.  Like Dedalus, Stephen in the story works on bulding "wings" so that he can do away with the things that he thinks is holding him back like religion, society, and family from his aim of being a true "artist".

"I will not serve that in which I no longer believe, whether it call itself my home, my fatherland, or my church: and I will try to express myself in some mode of life or art as freely as I can and as wholly as I can, using for my defence the only arms I allow myself to use—silence, exile, and cunning."

The book traces Stephen's journey through his formative years.  I was amazed at Joyce's use of language to depict the growth of the character.  As the character matures, the words used for the narrative becomes more complicated.  The thought process also becomes more complex.  Stephen studied in a boarding school when he was young and was heavily influenced by the Catholic faith.  As a teen, he tries to reconcile his physical desires with his faith.  Stephen eventually abandons everything in favor of pursuing his dream of being an artist.


"I go to encounter for the millionth time the reality of experience and to forge in the smithy of my soul the uncreated conscience of my race."

I liked the book because I think it more or less captures the process of self-discovery that we all go through. As Stephen puts it: "I was not myself as I am now, as I had to become."  

Falling in love with A Room with a View

I am not a big believer in coincidences but there are times that life seems to work in mysterious ways.   Last Wednesday, I talked about my experience watching Daniel Day-Lewis in There will be Blood.  At that time, I was reading A Room with a View by E.M. Forster.  Imagine my surprise when I learned that Daniel actually played Cecil Vyse in the movie adaptation of the book.

For me, the book is a love story, first and foremost.  It is the story of Lucy Honeychurch and how she attempts to reconcile her passions against the repressed society and its definition of what is polite and proper.

 Although I don't believe that there is complete freedom in our society compared to that of our ancestors, I am no less thankful that I do not have to deal with the same limitations.
Mr. Emerson accurately describes how archaic society can be:"Do you suppose there's any difference between Spring in nature and Spring in man?  But there we go, praising the one and condemning the other, ashamed that the same work eternally through both"

Making things more complicated for Lucy is her feelings for George, a man frowned upon by the polite society. 
"The contest lay not between love and duty. Perhaps there never is such a contest.  It lay between the real and the pretended, and Lucy's first aim was to defeat herself"

One of the things that I will always remember about the book is how some people can only be associated with "rooms" and some people can be associated with "views".  Rooms represents constraints and the need for structure while views are represented in the book as freedom and spontaneity.  There are also some people who are only made to be acquaintances and can never know anyone intimately.
"He’s only for an acquaintance. He is for society and cultivated talk...He is the sort who are all right so long as they keep to things—books, pictures—but kill when they come to people...Every moment of his life he’s forming you..."

As I said earlier, this book for me is a love story first and foremost so I don't have to expound on what happened in the end.  Besides, I really would recommend that one reads this book for oneself.  That is how much I love this book.  I just wish I can find a copy of the movie.  I want to see if I will be just as in love with the movie as I am with the book.

"It's so fluffy, I'm gonna die"

Just in case you live under a rock or something, I got the title from my previous post from the movie Despicable Me.  We had no plans of watching this movie but fortuitous events would have us do otherwise.  Thanks to the birthday of one of my friends, we were able to watch the movie in 3-D last Friday night.

Steve Carrell plays a super-villain who plans to steal the moon in an effort to get the spotlight and all the related perks from another super-villain.  To complete one essential part of this plan, he contrives to use three orphan girls but he gets more than he bargained for in the process.

Agnes is so adorable.

Kind of reminds me of me when I don't get my way (something my fiance can surely attest to...hehehe).  The movie isn't really catered for small kids but I found it thoroughly enjoyable and so endearing.

Miserable Me

I dived into the weekend determined to get as much rest and relaxation as I possibly can, after all, that is what weekends are all about, right?  But there are times that it doesn't matter how much you want something if your body is just as determined not to cooperate.

Last Sunday was one of the most miserable days I had in recent memory. My tummy woke me up at 3 am after only 3 hours of sleep and refused to give me a moment's rest (I will spare you the gory details).  I was only able to get some sleep when the sun was already up and the roosters have long stopped crowing.  To make up for the miserable start of my day, I decided to make a well-known comfort food here in the Philippines, Arroz Caldo.  After some searching in the net (get the recipe here), I came across a fairly easy recipe to follow and with some improvising (we did not have sticky rice and chicken thighs or drumsticks), I made my first Arroz Caldo ever.  Although I originally planned it to last until Monday breakfast since I also cooked Adobo for lunch and dinner but it didn't even last until Sunday dinner. (hehehe)

Back to my uncooperating tummy, even though I can't really blame anyone (no one made me eat all those popcorn Friday night), I was still so miserable about being sick and I actually had tears at one time.  It is not really the pain but the feeling of helplessness that gets me.  Another thing is that it made me think about my mom.  Although my fiance does a pretty job of taking care of me even when I'm not sick, it's still different.

On a positive note, no Monday blues for today because of the president's declaration that September 10 is a holiday.  I plan to catch up on my reading then since I was not able to get any reading done last weekend,  I just hope my body will cooperate with me this time.

"I drink your milkshake"

Watching There Will Be Blood in DVD made me regret not watching it in the big screen when it first came out.  It might not have CGI effects that seem to embody almost every major Hollywood movie that is being released.  Its cast can hardly be called stellar.  But what it does have is Daniel Day-Lewis as Daniel Plainview.  No, let me rephrase that, Daniel Day-Lewis IS Daniel Plainview.  His performance as an oil prospector gave me goosebumps, to put it mildly.  He was nothing short of brilliant and truly deserving of all the awards he got for his performance.  

 The performance of Paul Dano as Eli Sunday should also be commended.  I hated him at sight. One of the most memorable moments for me were the last scenes between Daniel and Eli.  The title of this post is actually taken from that confrontation.  I think I need to have myself checked because of how much I relished what happened to Eli during those last moments.

The movie is almost 3 hours long but it is so rich and so vibrant that in the end, it seems as if 3 hours is not enough.  I know that I don't have the words to fully capture the brilliance of this movie so I won't even try.  My only wish is that they make more movies like this.  Kudos to Paul Thomas Anderson, Daniel Day-Lewis and the rest of the people behind this masterpiece.

Catching Up: The Great Gatsby

The novel captures the decadence of post-World War I American society and is considered to be an example of the Great American Novel. It has been included as required text for most high schools and colleges in the US. An interesting tidbit about the book is that there was a time that the author wanted to call the book "Trimalchio in West Egg"

One of the things that struck me was the narrator's description of Gatsby's dream and eventual fate. "...and his dream must have seemed so close that he could hardly fail to grasp it. He did not know that it was already behind him, somewhere back in that vast obscurity beyond the city, where the dark fields of the republic rolled on under the night." There are dreams that we hold sacred in our minds, picturing over and over again our moment of attaining it but when you finally achieve that dream, you realize that the dreamer that you were and the person that you are now cannot be reconciled anymore.

So, there, that's 7 down and only 89 more to go (hehehe).

Catching Up: The Island of Dr. Moreau

The Island of Dr. Moreau holds the distinction as being one of the few science fiction novels in my list.  This story vividly describes the experiences of Edward Prendick and his observations of another man's quest to "humanize" animals by performing vivisections on them. Although Moreau succeeds in making them walk upright and gives them a grasp of human language and comprehension, they revert back to their animalistic tendencies.

When Prendick finally returns to human society, he had a hard time assimilating himself with other people. "I could not persuade myself that men and women I met were not also another Beast People, animals half wrought into the outward image of human souls, and that they would presently begin to revert..."  I cannot help but wonder, are we not all beast people inside, capable of reverting at any moment?

Catching Up: Silas Marner

I thought I have been fairly conscientious in updating this blog on my progress on the books I have finished so far but, lo and behold, when I did a quick check, there were 3 books that I haven't posted here.  Well, actually, only 2 since I only finished Silas Marner last night.

Reading Silas Marner immediately after finishing The Crying Lot of 49 can be quite jarring.  I would even consider saying that they are different as night is to day as an understatement.  George Elliot is a perfect example of a realist novel.

It is a story about the redemption of a man; how he lost his gold, only to find something more precious. "As the child's mind was growing into knowledge, his mind was growing into memory: as her life unfolded, his soul, long stupefied in a cold narrow prison, was unfolding too, and trembling gradually into full consciousness."  This is one of the most heartwarming stories that I have read in a while and the happy ending goes to prove that good things happen to good people.

First Brush with Thomas Pynchon

Although I am what others might consider a bookworm, I am relatively an unadventurous reader and I frequently rely on authors that I have previously read (Anne Rice before her Christian series) or books that are in the bestseller list.  I also went through a sort of hiatus from reading and it was only last year that I consciously took steps to rediscover my love for reading.  The result was my "discovery" of authors like Chuck Palahniuk and and Haruki Murakami.  I also made an effort to read the timeless classics like War and Peace, Fountainhead, and Crime and Punishment.
One of the considerable upside with the goal that I have set for myself this year is that it will afford me the opportunity to read authors I normally would not go for.  It shames me to say that I had to google Thomas Pynchon given his notoriety.  I have 4 works of Thomas Pynchon in my list and first up was The Crying Lot of 49. 

 The Crying Lot of 49 is a postmodern fiction that deals with one woman's struggle to prove a theory: the existence of Tristero and the conspiracy behind it.  In her effort to find meaning among all the rambling information and seemingly meaningless events, she struggles between believing that it is real or that it is just an elaborate plan on the part of an ex-lover and that there are two possiblities: "Another mode of meaning behind the obvious or none."

Authors like Haruki Murakami, Gabriel Garcia-Marquez, and Kurt Vonnegut have already initiated me in postmodern fiction and I am well acquainted with "magical realism" but what made TCL49 so challenging were the multiple cultural references that were lost to me and would have offered me a more fruitful experience if only I got them.  But given that I was hampered by my own limitations when I read this book, I still found the experience a gratifying one and is a testament to the benefits of stepping out of one's own comfort zones.

"Oedipa wondered whether, whether at the end of this (if it were supposed to end), she too might not be left with only compiled memories of clues, intimations, but never the central truth itself, which must somehow each time be too bright for her memory to hold; which must always blaze out, destroying its own message irreversibly, leaving an overexposed blank when the ordinary world came back"

Dream a little dream: my wish list for the next 2 years

In one of my earlier posts, I mentioned that I was able find most of the books in my to be read list online.  I am now posting the list of books that I have yet to find as part of my wish list (hint*hint*ahem*ahem)
Wish List

1. A Thousand Cranes by Yasunari Kawabata

2. Against the Day by Thomas  Pynchon

3. Atonement by Ian McEwan

4. Austerlitz  by W.G. Sebald

5. Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery

6. Empire of the Sun  by J.G. Ballard

7. Life of Pi  by Yann Martel

8. Nostromo  by Joseph Conrad

9. On the Edge of Reason by Miroslav Krleza

10. Remembrance of Things Past  by Marcel Proust

11. Requiem for a Dream by Hubert  Selby Jr.

12. The Accidental by Ali Smith

13. The Bell  by Iris Murdoch

14. The Book of Daniel  by E.L. Doctorow

15. The Book of Laughter and Forgetting  by Milan Kundera

16. The Grapes of Wrath  by John Steinbeck

17. The Home and the World by Rabindranath Tagore

18. The Human Stain  by Philip Roth

19. The Melancholy of Resistance  by László Krasznahorkai

20. The Plague  by Albert Camus

21. The Portrait of a Lady  by Henry James

22. The Sea  by John Banville

23. The Sun Also Rises  by Ernest Hemingway

24. The Talented Mr. Ripley  by Patricia Highsmith

25. Vertigo  by W.G. Sebald

Of course my wish list would not be complete without some shooting for the stars entries:
26.  Kindle (or an Ipad...hehehe)
27. Asian tour for two (hint hint ahem ahem...hahaha)
28. Shopping trip in HK or Thailand (hehehe)
29. 24" (or higher) flat screen TV
30. Macbook or a pink Sony Vaio
31. Xperia X10

Ok ok, I know the last items in my list are pushing it but there's nothing wrong with dreaming big, right? It may be out there but I won't go as far as to say that it's out of the picture (hehehe)

Exuberant weekend

The long weekend is almost up and surprise, surprise, I am almost 3 days behind on my reading.  I find it somewhat ironic that I get more reading done during the weekdays.  Although I was able to finish "The Crying Lot of 49" last Saturday afternoon, I haven't been able to squeeze in any more reading time after that.  It is almost as if reading is akin to work.  Blasphemy!  But oh well, I just have to comfort myself with the fact that I cooked 3 new dishes over the last weekend.

As a spur of the moment thing, we bought sapsap or ponyfish last Saturday night.  I only had a vague idea of what I was going to do with it, more like a dim remembrance of how my lola used to cook it.  Good thing I came across a recipe for Pangat na Sapsap (find the recipe here) and we cooked it for lunch yesterday.  I find the dish really simple and it goes perfectly with rice (one proof of that is that Fil consumed twice than what he normally eats for lunch...hehehe)

We went to Greenhills last Saturday and I tried out the Raspberry yogurt of Golden Spoon.  It was nothing spectacular and Fil even went as far as to compare it to Tempra but it was not as bad as that.  I definitely prefer it compared to the chocolate icicle passing off as yogurt from Tutti Frutti. It just made me miss White Hat's Green Apple Yogurt even more.

After Greenhills, we went straight to Robinsons in BF to do the groceries (well, our main destination is really the building beside it...hehe).  We tried out the pizza place in the 2nd floor of Robinsons and it was a good thing that we did.  As a rule, my fiance and I don't really eat in pizza places because he is not a fan but the Buffalo Wings of that restaurant (for the life of me, I cant remember the name of the place) quickly made a convert out of him.  I opted for the traditional pepperoni pizza and I loved it.  Can't wait to taste their other pizzas and stromboli.

The Sunday and Monday was spent lazing around and catching up on DVDs.  Fil made me watch "Cinco" and as my revenge, I made him watch "I'll Be There" with me. As they say, all is fair in love and war.

On a totally unrelated side-note, I was really happy to hear that Sheldon Cooper (Jim Parsons) won in the Emmys for Outstanding Actor in a Comedy Series.  I am so in love with him and I am even willing to learn Klingon for him.  Can't wait for the new season of the Big Bang Theory.

Re-acquainting myself with Sherlock and Holly

Holly Golightly and Sherlock Holmes are both iconic in their own rights.  Simple black dress, string of pearls,  sunglasses, and holding an oversized cigarette holder, Audrey Hepburn as Holly Golightly succeeded in creating one of the most memorable images in cinema.

I watched Breakfast at Tifanny's back when I was still in HS and I am rather ashamed of myself to say that it took this list of 1001 books to make me read the novella by Truman Capote.  What can I say, I love the book just as I love the movie.

As expected, the movie has already been given the "Hollywood" treatment as compared to the book.  The book is no love story (although half the characters are in love with Holly just like in the movie).  Instead, the book's ending is more open to interpretation.  The book also focuses on how Holly threw everything away in hopes of finding something akin to home.  One of the most memorable things about the book was Holly's relationship with her cat who she refused to give a name only to realize that they do belong together.

As embarrassing as it is to admit, my first encounter with the Sherlock Holmes was also thanks to Hollywood's Robert Downer Jr.-starrer.  But of course we all know that Sherlock Holmes has already become an archetype for detectives together with his trusty sidekick Watson and for this, I included The Hound of the Baskervilles in my list.

I was kind of let down by the experience.  Part of the reason is that I don't really like reading detective stories.  I have a problem with reading whodunit stories because I find myself constantly distracted with the desire to just skip to the ending and find out what the whole hullabaloo is all about. But another reason why I was disappointed was that I was able to guess the culprit was very early on in the story and I was also spot-on with regards to one of the villain's secret.  But I still consider reading Sherlock Holmes an enjoyable experience and I still plan to read The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes (it is part of the 1001 books but I did not include it in my 151 books) after I have accomplished my goal for 2012.

Perusal of Notes from Underground

I finished Notes from Underground yesterday morning and I can't help but compare the experience with the one I had for other works of Dostoevsky.  His works draw you in.  I found myself struggling to stay with the book for the first 3-5 chapters.  Then I just found myself immersed in the whole experience.  Even after I put the book down for a breather, there is still a part of my brain that stays absorbed in the story.  When I reached the end of the book, I found myself feeling strangely cut off.  I find myself so involved with the characters that I can't let go that easily.    

Notes from Underground is stark and existentialist in essence.  It deals with the darker side of a person and what we as individuals, fail to admit to ourselves. 

 One of the things that struck me was the argument of the narrator on why people do the thing that seems to be against all common sense and defies rational thought. "...reason is an excellent thing, there's no disputing that, but reason is nothing but reason and satisfies only the rational side of man's nature, while will is a manifestation of the whole life, that is, of the whole human life including reason and all the impulses."  He argues that one of the things that people fail to consider is the presence of choice and that individuals will sometimes go as far as doing the thing that is most harmful to himself just to prove that he has a freedom of choice.

"And who knows (there is no saying with certainty), perhaps the only goal on earth to which mankind is striving lies in this incessant process of attaining, in other words, in life itself, and not in the thing to be attained, which must always be expressed as a formula, as postive as twice two makes four, and such postiveness is not life, but is the beginning of death."

As always, reading Dostoevsky is a heady experience and although Notes from Underground is not at par with The Brothers Karamazov and Crime and Punishment, I still find the experience well worth it.

Multi-tasking Weekend

Last week, I posted here my goal of finishing 151 books from the 1001 books you must read before you die.  In order to gain some headway, I spent several hours finding electronic copies of the books on the list.  It is actually surprising the amount of literature that is already available for free in sites like the project gutenberg.  You just have to download it in the format readable by your favorite reader.

It is not really that practical for me to buy the hardcopy version of every book in my list.  Aside from the obvious economic concerns on my part, there is much to be desired in the bookstores here in the Philippines.  Everytime I enter a branch of the leading bookstore here, I can't help but compare it to one of the bookstores along Orchard Road that I visited when I went to Singapore.  One can actually get lost in that place.  But of course I still plan to buy the actual printed copies of some of the books in my list, especially the long novels (e.g. 2666).  There is a different thrill in reading an actual book...the actual act of turning the pages, leaf by leaf...so tangible and old school.  Many of the contemporary works in my list are also not available so I have to scour for them in the bookstores here.

But I am happy to report that I now have enough ebooks to keep me occupied until end of this year.  On a side note, I was also able to finish "The Island of Dr. Moreau" over the weekend.  I know, I know...it is really not that much of an accomplishment since the book is relatively short.  Still, I am happy to count 1 book down and only 95 more to go.

I am actually happy with last weeked as far as weekends are concerned.  My fiance and I cooked Pork Binagoongan (Pork in Shrimp Paste).  Well, he actually did all the prep stuff and I just supervised. Hehehe.  We were also able to finish all season 21 episodes of "The Simpsons" and we also watched a HK movie (Magic Kitchen).  The series was mostly funny (I still prefer the older seasons), movie was so-so (to think that it stars Andy Lau...so disappointing), and the food was uber yummy. I am actually looking forward to the next weekend already.

Bad case of the Monday blues

So it is Monday yet again and I am once more a part of the general populace that is continually grinding and toiling amidst the hustle and bustle of the city...sorry for the touch of melodrama back there...Mondays and I have a hate-love relationship (with more emphasis on the hate part).

It doesn't help that this particular Monday was previously announced as a National Holiday (by previously, I mean, January this year).  But what can we do?  There was a new president elected this year and he sure is hell-bent on distancing himself from all the policies of the previous government...even the ones that work.  I am all for holding the past administration accountable for whatever they did but when you try to change everything just to prove a point then it becomes counter-productive and even petty.  Stick with what what works great, improve on everything else.  Instead of dwelling on discussions on which holidays should be abolished, there are actually more important issues to be tackled, as the president himself raised on his first SONA. We get it MR. President...you are not anything like the ex-president...When you already have your mind set as early as 8 months ago that you will NOT be working on this particular day, it is a little hard not to go all political on the one person that got you stuck behind your desk.

I could have been lying on the beach sipping an ice-cold pinacolada, Mr. President...well, not really that but you get my point.

Semblance of a Goal

After watching Julie/Julia last week, I felt the sudden urge to accomplish something as tangible as being able to cook all the recipes in the first book by Julia Child.  Of course, I am not really that willing to subject myself through the same "torture" as Julie Powell put herself through.  As much as I profess to love food, I shirk at the thought of deboning a duck and dropping live lobsters in a cauldron of boiling water....

So my pot of gold at the end of the rainbow will be related to one of the things I love....books, lots and lots of books....

Last year, a friend of mine gave me an excel version of the "1001 Books You Must Read Before You Die" and I have decided to make this my goal....well, not really the 1001 books...I have to draw the line somewhere.  I have heard time and again that the best objectives are those that are actually achievable and this feat of mine should be no different.  So, here is my goal, "To have read 151 books from the list by December 2011"

Here are my statistics: I have read 55 books from the list so far which leaves 96 books to be read in 1 Year, 4 Months, 1 Week and 5 Days. I had no clear criteria when I selected the 96 books.  Given my leanings towards the literature from 1970 onwards, I just tried to make it a mix between contemporary and the classic.  I also included books that I never would have read otherwise like "The Island of Dr. Moreau".  Of course, I also took into consideration that it must be available in English.  I don't want to add the complication of learning a new language.  In terms of length, it is ranging from 2666 and Les Miserables (Thank God I have already finished War and Peace before I attempted this) to Notes from the Underground.

Books I have read so far:
 

1. The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Díaz

2. The Inheritance of Loss by Kiran Desai

3. The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri

4. Kafka on the Shore  by Haruki Murakami

5. The Corrections  by Jonathan Franzen

6. The Devil and Miss Prym by Paulo Coelho

7. Veronika Decides to Die  by Paulo Coelho

8. The God of Small Things  by Arundhati Roy

9. Fall on Your Knees by Ann-Marie MacDonald

10. The Reader  by Bernhard Schlink

11. The Virgin Suicides  by Jeffrey Eugenides

12. Like Water for Chocolate  by Laura Esquivel

13. Watchmen  by Alan Moore

14. Love in the Time of Cholera  by Gabriel García Márquez

15. The Unbearable Lightness of Being  by Milan Kundera

16. The Name of the Rose  by Umberto Eco

17. Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy  by Douglas Adams

18. The Shining  by Stephen King

19. Interview With the Vampire  by Anne Rice

20. The Bluest Eye  by Toni Morrison

21. Slaughterhouse Five  by Kurt Vonnegut

22. The Godfather  by Mario Puzo

23. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez

24. No One Writes to the Colonel by Gabriel García Márquez

25. Catch-22  by Joseph Heller

26. Things Fall Apart  by Chinua Achebe

27. The Lord of the Rings  by J.R.R. Tolkien

28. Foundation  by Isaac Asimov

29. The Catcher in the Rye  by J.D. Salinger

30. I, Robot  by Isaac Asimov

31. Nineteen Eighty-Four  by George Orwell

32. The Little Prince  by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

33. Siddhartha  by Herman Hesse

34. Rashomon  by Akutagawa Ryunosuke

35. The Thirty-Nine Steps  by John Buchan

36. Sons and Lovers  by D.H. Lawrence

37. Death in Venice  by Thomas Mann

38. Ethan Frome  by Edith Wharton

39. Howards End  by E.M. Forster

40. Heart of Darkness  by Joseph Conrad

41. The War of the Worlds  by H.G. Wells

42. Dracula  by Bram Stoker

43. The Time Machine  by H.G. Wells

44. The Picture of Dorian Gray  by Oscar Wilde

45. The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde  by Robert Louis Stevenson

46. Bel-Ami  by Guy de Maupassant

47. The Death of Ivan Ilyich  by Leo Tolstoy

48. Around the World in Eighty Days  by Jules Verne

49. War and Peace  by Leo Tolstoy

50. Little Women  by Louisa May Alcott

51. Crime and Punishment  by Fyodor Dostoevsky

52. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland  by Lewis Carroll

53. The Hunchback of Notre Dame  by Victor Hugo

54. Frankenstein  by Mary Shelley

55. Oroonoko  by Aphra Behn

Books I have to finish:

1. Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery

2. Invisible by Paul Auster

3. American Rust by Philipp Meyer

4. The Blind Side of the Heart by Julia Franck

5. Falling Man by Don DeLillo

6. Half of a Yellow Sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

7. Against the Day by Thomas  Pynchon

8. Carry Me Down by M.J. Hyland

9. The Sea  by John Banville

10. The Accidental by Ali Smith

11. 2666 by Roberto Bolano

12. Everything is Illuminated  by Jonathan Safran Foer

13. Life of Pi  by Yann Martel

14. Austerlitz  by W.G. Sebald

15. Atonement by Ian McEwan

16. The Human Stain  by Philip Roth

17. The Hours  by Michael Cunningham

18. Underworld  by Don DeLillo

19. A Fine Balance  by Rohinton Mistry

20. The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle  by Haruki Murakami

21. A Suitable Boy  by Vikram Seth

22. The Dumas Club by Arturo Perez-Reverte

23. Mao II  by Don DeLillo

24. American Psycho  by Bret Easton Ellis

25. Vertigo  by W.G. Sebald

26. The Melancholy of Resistance  by László Krasznahorkai

27. Foucault’s Pendulum  by Umberto Eco

28. The Satanic Verses  by Salman Rushdie

29. The Black Dahlia  by James Ellroy

30. The Bonfire of the Vanities  by Tom Wolfe

31. Beloved  by Toni Morrison

32. The Cider House Rules  by John Irving

33. The Handmaid’s Tale  by Margaret Atwood

34. White Noise  by Don DeLillo

35. Empire of the Sun  by J.G. Ballard

36. Schindler’s Ark  by Thomas Keneally

37. The Book of Laughter and Forgetting  by Milan Kundera

38. Requiem for a Dream by Hubert  Selby Jr.

39. Autumn of the Patriarch  by Gabriel García Márquez

40. Gravity’s Rainbow  by Thomas Pynchon

41. The Book of Daniel  by E.L. Doctorow

42. The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov

43. The Crying of Lot 49 by Thomas Pynchon

44. In Cold Blood by Truman Capote

45. Arrow of God  by Chinua Achebe

46. V. by Thomas Pynchon

47. The Bell Jar  by Sylvia Plath

48. A Clockwork Orange  by Anthony Burgess

49. To Kill a Mockingbird  by Harper Lee

50. Breakfast at Tiffany’s  by Truman Capote

51. The Bell  by Iris Murdoch

52. The Talented Mr. Ripley  by Patricia Highsmith

53. Lolita  by Vladimir Nabokov

54. The Last Temptation of Christ  by Nikos Kazantzákis

55. Lord of the Flies  by William Golding

56. A Thousand Cranes by Yasunari Kawabata

57. The Plague  by Albert Camus

58. For Whom the Bell Tolls  by Ernest Hemingway

59. Finnegans Wake  by James Joyce

60. The Grapes of Wrath  by John Steinbeck

61. On the Edge of Reason by Miroslav Krleza

62. Of Mice and Men  by John Steinbeck

63. Their Eyes Were Watching God  by Zora Neale Hurston

64. The Hobbit  by J.R.R. Tolkien

65. A Farewell to Arms  by Ernest Hemingway

66. Lady Chatterley’s Lover  by D.H. Lawrence

67. Remembrance of Things Past  by Marcel Proust

68. The Sun Also Rises  by Ernest Hemingway

69. The Great Gatsby  by F. Scott Fitzgerald

70. The Trial  by Franz Kafka

71. A Passage to India  by E.M. Forster

72. Ulysses  by James Joyce

73. The Age of Innocence  by Edith Wharton

74. The Home and the World by Rabindranath Tagore

75. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man  by James Joyce

76. The Rainbow  by D.H. Lawrence

77. A Room With a View  by E.M. Forster

78. The House of Mirth  by Edith Wharton

79. Nostromo  by Joseph Conrad

80. The Ambassadors  by Henry James

81. The Hound of the Baskervilles  by Arthur Conan Doyle

82. The Island of Dr. Moreau  by H.G. Wells

83. Tess of the D’Urbervilles  by Thomas Hardy

84. The Portrait of a Lady  by Henry James

85. Ben-Hur  by Lew Wallace

86. Anna Karenina  by Leo Tolstoy

87. Middlemarch  by George Eliot

88. Notes from the Underground  by Fyodor Dostoevsky

89. Les Misérables  by Victor Hugo

90. Silas Marner  by George Eliot

91. Madame Bovary  by Gustave Flaubert

92. The Scarlet Letter  by Nathaniel Hawthorne

93. Wuthering Heights  by Emily Brontë

94. Vanity Fair  by William Makepeace Thackeray

95. Pride and Prejudice  by Jane Austen

96. Sense and Sensibility  by Jane Austen

So here's to having goals and achieving them....